i love jelly beans

he had such quiet eyes

2012-02-03T10:13:00.000-08:00

he had such quiet eyes

she did not realise

they were two pools of lies

layered with thinnest ice

to her, those quiet eyes

were breathing desolate sighs

imploring her to be nice

and to render him paradise

if only she'd been wise

and had listened to the advice

never to compromise

with pleasure-seeking guys

she'd be free from "the hows and whys"

now here's a bit of advice

be sure that nice really means nice

then you'll never be losing at dice

though you may lose your heart once or twice

BIBSY SOENHARJO

supposedly

2012-02-02T10:05:00.000-08:00

i was supposed to be your best friend. but i fell in love with you.
you were supposed to be my best friend. but because of me you stopped.
we were supposed to keep each other's company. but shit happens all the time.

i was supposed to forget you. but it was so hard and im still trying.
you were supposed to text me. but you refuse because you think i will not like it.
we were supposed to be happy. but i insisted on making you confused and we were not happy because of that.

i was supposed to understand how you suffer being with me. but i didnt.
i was supposed to respect your perspectives towards girls. but i refused to listen.
i was supposed to text you to tell you how sorry i am. but my ego said, i've caused too much pain that you deserve to be free.
i was supposed to let you go. but i cant.
and since you didnt text me, i assumed you've moved on.
i should have understood that you never loved me more than a best friend.

i just want to let you know. it's a good thing that you have made it clear of where i stand in your life.
i accept it. thank you.

letting go

2012-01-30T22:12:00.000-08:00

to be in a relationship is a very hard thing to commit to. sometimes we have to learn to let go. you dont love me. i wont force you. im letting you go MAMN. have a good life.

heart

2012-01-19T14:21:00.000-08:00

this heart never knows what we actually long for.. it craves for something you yourself cant even reach. i've found what my heart wants. love. from my family, my girls and MAMN. this heart will never be satisfied unless i earned everything i've been longing for.. i need your love people..

promise

2012-01-08T09:53:00.000-08:00

when you promise to yourself or to anyone else to be new. in which means TRANSFORMATION, you should never ever look behind anymore. promises made by people who are determine. not for those who THINK they are determine. beware people. promises are made to be broken and believe me, we do not want it to happen. i hardly promise. because i have a tendency to brake it. so dont make me, because i am so going to dissapoint you..

haha emo! okay bye nk tdo besok paper cross-cultural interaction. :D

2012

2012-01-01T13:28:00.002-08:00

hey it's 2012,

first of all, i would like to welcome this new year.

and also expressing my great and undivided thank you to Allah for giving me another chance of living.

with hopes that 2012 would treat me a little bit more flexible than what 2011 had put me through.

2011 was a bit stressing at the very end of it.

but lets just put it behind and begin a new chapter.

2012 brings a lot of meanings to my life.

new hopes, new plans, new life.

unfortunately it began with examinations of semester 3 and also a shocking wedding of an aunt.

well looking at the bright sight, examination is just a phase before a long term break and the wedding is good in terms of..... i dont know.. that is simply because i tend to develop this kind of belief that nobody is meant to be together forever *quoted from NoStringsAttached*

so yeah.. lets make this 2012 a total different phase of life. obviously better.... or worst. whatever, as long as it's different.. ha ha!

a thousand years

2011-12-30T11:20:00.000-08:00

Heartbeats fast
Colors and promises
How to be brave
How can I love when I’m afraid to fall
But watching you stand alone
All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow
One step closer

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don’t be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I love you for a thousand more

Time stands still
Beauty in all she is
I will be brave
I will not let anything take away
What’s standing in front of me
Every breath
Every hour has come to this
One step closer

And all along I believed I would find you

Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I love you for a thousand more

One step closer
One step closer

MAMN....

2011-12-25T11:20:00.000-08:00

i miss you...

this hurts

2011-12-14T18:41:00.000-08:00

imagine when someone who you trust with all your heart suddenly turn against you. or in other words, backstabbing you~ it hurts people.

broken

2011-12-13T19:59:00.000-08:00

broken relationship hurts. family, friends or lover. it still hurts regardless. im not saying sorry as i know what im doing is right.

i turn to you

2011-12-05T08:54:00.000-08:00

due to some stupid occasions. i cant find someone to turn to. as last resort, i turn to you. shameless i am because last time we had a conversation, you made it clear that you dont wanna have anything to do with me anymore. im honestly sorry.

through

2011-12-05T02:09:00.000-08:00

have been trying to co-op with life lately. have been trying to search for the tools that can mend my broken heart. here i lie hurt.

how am i suppose to co-op when all i can see is you. behind my laugh there you are. behind my tears there you are. hoping to have you back cheering me up. but that hope i put for myself was nothing but hope.

reality says i should move on. i am moving on. based on what i had with you. memories. i can never let it go.

what you said was true. you will hurt me. i dont enjoy being hurt. who does? but what keeps me moving is that i am hurt because of you. and so i enjoy it. because it is because of you, mamn.

hope.

2011-11-28T08:56:00.000-08:00

im not kidding around this time.. and i really mean what im going to say.

i have faith in us. so stop making me believe that we are not meant to be together. because honestly, i think you havent taken me seriously. why cant you believe in us???? we still have hope. i know that.

a proud sister.

2011-11-27T11:47:00.000-08:00

this post is for my beloved younger brother,

muhd muqri bin mohd azmi.

my little brother is one tough boy. circumcised. i know it hurts so bad but u managed to control yourself and get through with it WITHOUT screaming..*unlike the other kids* you made me proud honey. all i heard when you were trying to fight against the pain was "ALLAH HU AKHBAR!". it brings tears to my eyes hearing you are holding tight to the faith that Allah is always with you.

im now announcing myself as a very proud sister.

tq.. :)

dream

2011-11-26T08:33:00.001-08:00

i dreamed about you last night. about us. and i was horrified. it had the worst ending i could ever dream of.

we went to 1 of our friend's wedding together. we walked into the house. met the couple n guests. and there she was. smiling at you. without knowing that we were actually together. wanted to talk to you. she came closer and held your hand. i did not do anything except watching you. hoping that you might introduce me to her. but no. you smiled and followed her. and the last thing i saw were tear drops on my hand.

i woke up. puzzled. what should i do now. i need you to tell me.

when the time comes.

2011-11-19T10:50:00.000-08:00

if only i could say to you these words. i would have said it. i know im not capable of doing it. and so i need your help to understand me. to understand my unsaid message. but u failed. u will never understand. and im hurt. this is hard for me. i know it is hard for you too. but we have to keep trying. but trying only is not enough. i need willingness and faith. but i can sense that my presence is nothing but a burden. i understand that. without you telling me. and how can that happen? indescribable. when the time comes, u'll know how it feels like to be me. to love and never be loved. i understand that. cause that's my story. but not yet yours.

IF ONLY

2011-11-18T22:08:00.001-08:00

watched the movie and cried.. what an emotional moment!

Love Will Show You Everything (Jennifer Love Hewitt)

Today, today I bet my life

You have no idea

What I feel inside

Don't, be afraid to let it show

For you'll never know

If you let it hide

I love you

You love me

Take this gift and don't ask why

Cause if you will let me

I'll take what scares you

Hold it deep inside

And if you ask me why I'm with you

And why I'll never

Leave

Love will show you everything

One day

When youth is just a memory

I know you'll be standing right next to me

I love you

You love me

Take this gift and don't ask why

Cause if you will let me

I'll take what scares you

Hold it deep inside

And if you ask me why I'm with you

And why I'll never

Leave

My love will show you everything

insidious

2011-11-16T16:32:00.000-08:00

at night, i can see myself sleeping.

great movie. bullshit ending.

black

2011-11-14T09:59:00.000-08:00

when everything turns black, that's the only legal time for you to let your mind free. think what you wanna think, imagine whatever come crossing your mind. and after that, you'll be drifted into a very deep and peaceful slumber until you wake up the next morning and you feel empty. but what if your imagination gone wild thus making you feel restless when you are suppose to relax? i've experienced that.

i imagined. then i tried to sleep. but i failed. my mind couldn't seem to let go what i just imagined. frustrated i was. i got up and put my sleeping mask on. black. but still i can't sleep. what was i imagining just now? i couldn't remember. i tried and tried and tried to remember and black. i fell asleep.

i love you, i did

2011-11-13T18:46:00.000-08:00

all the waiting is finally over. it is true that god gives his blessings for those who are in need and for those who are patient. all the questions have been answered. she was laying on her bed, comforting herself with words that nobody could understand. restless she is. she held her pillow close, trying to find the scent her mother left on it but to no avail. she took her phone, and wrote a text to someone. "im still waiting" she said. hoping that the person she sent the text was already asleep. she did not need an answer that night, she was just trying to remind herself that she still had a hope to keep waiting. she was wrong. he replied. "i love you, i did" she frowned. he DID. but after that she smiled. confidently she said to herself "what a gross grammatical error" and she laughed so loudly that her roommate asked her to shut up. ^^

MAMN

2011-11-10T10:19:00.000-08:00

she was staring at the glass window in her room. looking for any dirt on it. the result was still the same as 30 minutes ago. the window was clean - without a single dirt on it. weird. she couldn't find herself satisfied with it. when she asked herself if the window clean, her mind said yes, but her heart said no. maybe the problem was her heart, not the window. yes, the heart was broken. she reached for the cigarette box under her pillow - hiding it from her parents. that was the only thing that could soothed her. weird. non of those cigarettes she smoked soothed her tonight. maybe she was waiting for something. but what was it she waited for? a call? yes, a call. from who? only she knew. hope. she was hoping for him to call and to explain. explanation. something that she couldn't understand unless she was being explained about it. she kept on waiting and waiting. and yes, someone called her. she smiled but beneath that smile she reminded herself to be strong. she was ready. ready for explanation. but all that someone said was goodnight. frustrated she was. a few minutes after that, she received a text saying "im sorry, goodnight." a strong girl she was, replied "you don't need to be sorry. i just want an answer". and she didn't get a reply. and so, she kept on waiting.

bryan adams - everything i do, i do it for you

2011-10-15T05:19:00.000-07:00

Look into my eyes - you will see
What you mean to me
Search your heart - search your soul
And when you find me there you'll search no more

Don't tell me it's not worth tryin' for
You can't tell me it's not worth dyin' for
You know it's true
Everything I do - I do it for you

Look into your heart - you will find
There's nothin' there to hide
Take me as I am - take my life
I would give it all - I would sacrifice

Don't tell me it's not worth fightin' for
I can't help it - there's nothin' I want more
Ya know it's true
Everything I do - I do it for you

There's no love - like your love
And no other - could give more love
There's nowhere - unless you're there
All the time - all the way

Oh - you can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for
I can't help it - there's nothin' I want more
I would fight for you - I'd lie for you
Walk the wire for you - ya I'd die for you

Ya know it's true
Everything I do - I do it for you

another meaningful lyrics from u syg.. i really appreciate it.. love uuuuuuuuuuuu

hero

2011-09-26T11:19:00.000-07:00

Let me be your hero

Would you dance if I asked you to dance?
Would you run and never look back
Would you cry if you saw me crying
Would you save my soul tonight?

Would you tremble if I touched your lips?
Would you laugh oh please tell me these
Now would you die for the one you love?
Hold me in your arms tonight?

I can be you hero baby
I can kiss away the pain
I will stand by you forever
You can take my breath away

Would you swear that you'll always be mine?
Would you lie would you run away
Am I in to deep?
Have I lost my mind?
I don't care you're here tonight

I just want to hold you
Am I in too deep?
Have I lost my mind?
Well I don't care you're here tonight

You can take my breath my breath away
I can be your hero

*thx syg for the song.. i would definitely do everything you ask me to do but one thing, forgetting you.. love you MAMN.. :*

zoul.

2011-07-30T09:48:00.000-07:00

this is zoul.

it was in 2009 when i 1st met him. he's funny, chubby not to mention and a very good friend. i enjoyed watching tv at the dining hall with him, having him helping on my computer literacy assignment n also my blog, n lastly, teasing each other (i miss pulling your goaty. haha!). haha.. fun times~

(this pic was taken in tmn teruntum kuantan)

i just wanna wish you a very happy birthday.. you are a fun person. keep it that way.. and remember, you are already -ty not -teen anymore. so no more childish stuffs ok.. hahahaha

stay silent or speak ur mind. you choose.

2011-07-29T06:12:00.000-07:00

stay silent doesn't mean that you're a chicken. you observe and evaluate. that's what you do. cause when someone is trying to step on you, you can easily pick his/her weaknesses from the observation you made on his/her before. that way, victory is always on your way. but just make sure that nobody knows your weaknesses. because people will always find ways to bring you down once they were humiliated.

people who speak their mind are not stupid or big talkers. you are brave and risk takers. people salute you when they're on your side. people should never go against you for something that you truly believe unless they can prove to you that it is wrong. you are the last person people wanna mess with. you wont stop hurting your enemies till they apologize.

if you have valid proves, then talk.

2011-07-25T11:04:00.000-07:00

have u guys heard of the lynas issue recently? basically, a project name lynas is going to operate in gebeng kuantan. well, it is true that lynas get a lot of anti-fans but still havent you heard that 99% of the anti-fans are chinese?? through a specific investigation by the gov, lynas project will cause us millions, but, much more millions in return. it is now one of the ways for our country to compete with china who holds 95% profits of the rare earth market. uhuh.. obviously we're dealing with a lot of money and who is it for may i hear your answer. yes! for the fucking sake of the country and pahang itself (who as you all known, has a lot of trouble regarding money). back to the anti-fans, well, since independent, chinese has dominated the business sector.. oh yeah.. may i repeat, CAPITAL sector. so lynas actually gives no opportunity for the chinese to involve as the government want the malay people to take part wholly in this project. that is why chinese are half crazy about this. it is now make sense isnt it? they dont want the malays to step on their major so they bring out some SCARY false fact about lynas. woooo. radiation... scary much huh.. dont say that malays are taking this thing politically, chinese are doing the same thing too and yet, disguised as if they only wanna bring peace to mother nature as to saving it for the future generations.

dear anti-lynas people,

as a pro-lynas person i dont think all of you know what lynas is all about. people make conferences for it and you guys just sit at the comfort of your home listen to nothing and here is the result, some clueless people. read and make a research on lynas. if you r too lazy to read or too stupid to conduct a research, u better start listening to the discussions. swearing wont make you a knowledgeable person. think people. i feel bad for everyone who criticized the gov. u guys r the dummies of the opponent. too bad. some malays are not excluded. open your eyes. if you have valid proves, then talk. if not, keep yourselves updated.

ayah

2011-07-17T11:08:00.000-07:00

ayah, i know you're strong.

ayah, i know you can handle this.

ayah, please be strong.

you're the strength of our family

ayah, we love you no matter what.

ayah, please remember that whatever happens you have us behind your back.

you have your family.

we love you.

that's the most important thing, ayah.

this is bell.

2011-07-16T10:16:00.000-07:00

Name : Nurfarahi Nabilah Mohd Azmi

Age : 19 years 11 months

Sex : Female

Race : Malay

this is bell.

short hair. full smile. bright girl. extremely talkative. a bit immature in handling things. honest. straight-forward. easy-going. free. punctual. courageous. great student. best daughter. fun kaklong.

this is still bell. almost 2 years later.

still with short hair. same smile. not-so-bright girl. talkative. a bit immature in handling CERTAIN things. still honest. still straight-forward. be friends only with people who she thinks deserve to be her friends. free. late comer. courageous sometimes. bad student. good daughter. serious kaklong.

time changes me.

back to normal

2011-05-07T03:05:00.000-07:00

everything is back to normal

no more fighting about our feelings

everything is back to normal

we start ignoring each other again

everything is back to normal

he stops answering my phone calls

everything is back to normal

he ignores me completely

everything is back to normal

i am myself now.

im thankful that everything is back to normal.

again

2011-05-04T10:04:00.001-07:00

"The Way I Am"

If you were falling, then I would catch you.
You need a light, I'd find a match.

Cause I love the way you say good morning.
And you take me the way I am.

If you are chilly, here take my sweater.
Your head is aching, I'll make it better.

Cause I love the way you call me baby.
And you take me the way I am.

I'd buy you Rogaine when you start losing all your hair.
Sew on patches to all you tear.

Cause I love you more than I could ever promise.
And you take me the way I am.
You take me the way I am.
You take me the way I am.

growing up

2011-04-06T18:55:00.000-07:00

growing up means responsibilities and maturity.

-if a person is not responsible enough parallel to her age, if a person is not responsible enough to herself, if a person is not responsible enough to the people around her-

can she be referred as grown up?

and

-if a person cant differentiate between right or wrong, if a person cant stop herself from doing something 'jeopardizing' (her life or some1else's life), if a person cant listen to people around her-

can she be referred as grown up?

self opinion, responsibilities and maturity comes together. when there's no maturity, responsibilities cant be traced. simple. if a person cant seem to listen to others' opinion, she's basically immature. and when she's immature she wont care about responsibilities.

think before you act. people around you might not be as stupid as you think they are. they are just observing you without you knowing it. WE ARE OBSERVING YOU.

backing off

2011-02-27T18:56:00.000-08:00

love means sacrifice.

if one is willing to sacrifice, she'll earn the love.

i have faith in it.

he was my love, he was my shadow.

we screwed once. n i thought that's just all.

life is somehow an amusing irony.

he's the mature one, and i am not.

he's the understandable one, and i am not.

he's the determine one, and i am not.

but now, im going to make things easy for him.

he doesnt has to choose because im backing off now.

i have to be the mature one right now.

i have to think of his happiness.

fight? im tired of fighting.

seriously, it's not worth it. because who is in his mind all this time, is that girl.

i promise i wont cry.

i promise i will be strong.

i promise i will continue living my life as usual.

i just hope that he wont piss off with me for doing this.

and i hope that he could understand why im doing this to him.

thx

2011-01-16T19:29:00.000-08:00

typical human, never appreciate what they have in life

typical human, hard to admit their mistakes (even the little ones)

typical human, seldomly aware of their self-selfishness
typical human, rarely realize it when they hurt someone's feelings.
that's human being. they're imperfect. Simply because God creates them that way.
but being imperfect doesnt mean you can trash your life away.
you should at least try to be perfect for yourself.
so that you can allow yourself to bring the true definition of peace in your everyday life.

yay! im now a blogger! *duh,, again?*
so wsup wit the sarcastic melancholic intro after a long no-show?
sorry readers, i've been very bz managing my life
have to sort somethings out, arranging my life n keeping on tracks with everything
there're tons of problems to be solved, broken heart to be mend n assignments to be done.

yeah,, u can say that my life sucks. it is actually.
but lately it has been neutral.
whenever there's a down-come HE will neutralize it in order to cover the misery im having.
thx to HIM for giving me the most precious gift a person can have.
-PEOPLE AROUND ME-

i was once thought im sick of meeting people..
but now, at some points, i think all i can do best is to mingle with people.
im learning to accept all the people around me,
im learning to forgive the person who has done wrong to me,
im learning to appreciate what god has given me,
im learning to excel in my studies.
im learning to behave like im suppose to.
im still learning people. im still learning.
and that is me.

akeelah and the bee

2010-12-02T09:39:00.000-08:00

i got this amazing quote from the the movie akeelah and the bee

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same."

does this quote means anything to us?

well, it's depends on you to think in your rightest mind if any of these words in this quote means anything to you. study it and understand it..

precious possessions

2010-10-26T11:50:00.000-07:00

my love 4 you guys is as much as the rain drops.

count it if u can.

u guys splash the colour of rainbow to my wall of life.

you guys r my precious possessions..

im glad 2 have u guys behind my back in my ups n downs.

thx 4 being there through my thick n thin..

study week

2010-10-21T22:16:00.000-07:00

study week i suppose to be a week of books in hand.. rite?

but believe it or not,, i havent find myself grabbing a book to read,, not even to hold it!!

look at it,, hmm.. numerous times~ wahahaha.

final exam for da 1st sem is just around da corner...

cmon bell!! start studying..

u hv 2 get good grades 4 ur 1st sem.. at least,, dean's list.

wahahahahha *harapan*

hv already spent a week at tasya's place..

bash said that dis is my second home.. wahahaha.. really???

helping tish wit her maths homework *man im a good teacher!*

helping tasya wit her grammar~ *okay i suck at this*

n helping aunty to evacuate her fridge.. *seriously,, im veeeeerrry good at this!*

oh i miss home~

empty

2010-10-18T02:41:00.000-07:00

i dont know what is happening 2 me l8ly.

i feel so empty.

i lied to my seniors n i was trapped.

i made my best friend's bf picked me up in the middle of nowhere at 3 am.

i was busted.

i didnt call my parents for a week and left my phone at the hostel.

i didnt show up for mandarin test.

i didnt talk much.

what is wrong with me??

i cant seem to find the answer.

im lost.. i need guidance. i need it.

a crush

2010-10-17T02:45:00.000-07:00

i like it when we fight

i like it when we laugh

i like it when we tell stories

i like it when we care bout each other

i like it when we chat

i like it when we are on the phone

i like it when we disagree with each other

i like it when we text

i like it when we comment on each other's status

there are so many thngs that i like about us.

oh how i wish this would last for long,,

because i really like u..

but with no reason, i started to feel like giving up.

jealousy?? that is obviously not the right word..

why would i be jealous?

the problem now is,,

you're just out of my league dude.

just a thought of you make me feel so small.

im nothing compared to you.

good bye for now.

p/s just watched a hindi movie - khabi alvida na kehna - it ws so sad, i cried~ okay im lame~

hellooooooooo oct~

2010-10-04T17:50:00.000-07:00

ouh oct,, shall i compare thee to a summer's day~

eww,, sounds sooo belle speare.. whhops!

neways,, oct come n ohoh.. got a list of activities to be done!

(n exams to be faced) so here we go...

1st to 30th - jln2 cr rumah sewa~

8th - modern dance perf at concorde hotel

9th - modern n traditional dance perf 4 upnm grad day~

13th to 17th - short n sweet dance comp at klpac

25th, 27th, 29th n 1nov - final examination!

there's a lot to be done here~~

bzbzbzbzbzzbzbzbzzzZZZzZzzZZzZZzzzzzZZZZz

dead 4 now~ l8er!

*bermimpi ngeri setiap hr.. huhuhuhu.. mgkin kne start bce doa sebelom tido*

gagagagaga~

*weyh tasya,, i xde idea douh nk tulis pe,, otak da penoh ngn ilmu zarina~ wahahahaha!*

*popo si rmbot merah,, nk ikot u blek sbh nti plsssssssss.. GEDIK2.*

duhhhh

2010-09-03T23:17:00.000-07:00

another boring weekend in s.alam.

god i wish i cud b home by today,,

luck is not on my side,, all the tickets were sold out!!

so,, im going back home on sunday.

went 2 Jakel and saw a very beautiful baju kurung for rye.

but i already have 4.. plus,, i dont wear bju kurung frequently.

but still attempt to ask mommy whether i can buy it or not.

mommy said NO!

okayy,, hahaha.. i cnt expect her to say yes 2 everythng.. rite??

not now,, nor ever..

2010-08-18T08:57:00.000-07:00

u seriously enjoy being a slut huh??

go on. who am i 2 advice u rite?

i ws just a one-time-savior of urs who suddenly gave shelter 2 you at 3am in da morning without thnking about my parents feelings n yes,, i dont even get da permission to let you stay in my parents' house!

hv u ever thnk about dat?

no rite?? ur too bz thinking of how 2 get a bf..

how 2 hv great SEX!

i risk being scolded by ayh just by having you as my friend!!

y wud i do such stupid thngs like care about u n stuffsssss???

bcoz I LOVE U, MY FRIEND!!!!!

hey bbe, listen!

dis is not da 1st time i write about u here.

may dis b da last post about u.

ur a friend of mine,

so pls,, dis is 4 ur own good!

i dont want u 2 repeat da same mistakes over and over again!!!!!

2 make it clear, i dont wanna c my friend got pregnant. n being kicked out if da college.

*eventho dats a good drama to c*

u love ur current friend dont u?

she enjoys listening 2 all ur stories about spending nitesss with ur bf at his place during weekendssssss..

[y there's soo many 's'? bcoz dis thing has been going on since a month ago!]

let me tell u dis,

a friend who only listened n nodded 4 everythng is not a good friend.

*im not saying dat im a good friend.. but dats da fact! n u hv 2 agree wit me*

if ur friend is not doing wut she is suppose 2 do, again, she's not a good friend..

my 2 fav people!

2010-08-16T05:16:00.000-07:00

1 is a counselor, the other 1 is a listener.

1 is a laughing partner, the other 1 is a swearing partner.

1 answers the phone like this "hello..yes speaking", the other 1 answers the phone like this "HELLO!ha, bell".

1 is like a brother, the other 1 is a best friend.

but no matter how differs they are from each other, these two people are the ones who show me how to be a strong girl.

today,, im proud to announce that im glad to have you guys by my side..

THANK YOUUUUU!

RAY.. n REDZ..

my fav guy..

2010-08-15T09:03:00.000-07:00

i dont expect him 2 b with me nor to wish me on my bday coz he's in da middle of nowhere, sailing...........

but *honestly* deep down inside,, im begging 4 him 2 call.

do u rmmbr my bday?

do u even know when is my bday?

cn u call me? coz imy so bad.

browsing tru ur pics wit ur fiancee,, i smile.

not because im jealous,, but simply because i'm thinking of how good it is 2 be by ur side.

but that's just a mere imagination of mine which people dont even bother.

i dont know if u notice this but we've known each other 4 2 years now.

wut a long period of time huh..

haha..

really hope 2 c u soon.

my mr sailor...................................

a month in UiTM SHAH ALAM!

2010-08-15T00:35:00.000-07:00

i admit that i dont love uitm shah alam as much as i love uitm kuantan,,

but it's good 2 acknowledge u guys dat life in shah alam is da real college life.

i cn 2 do wut i love 2 do *DANCING*

fellow crazy classm8s

it's da whole new experience of living..

seriously,, im in a huge lost if missed all of these thngs!

starting with classmates

n my new love!!!! PRISMA

blessed

2010-08-14T07:21:00.000-07:00

it's been a long time since my last post..

*which was before i got into college*

i'm drowning in a very tight schedule of mine..

cnt seem find any free time 4 blogging.

but i seriously need 2 update u guys about dis meaningful event of my life

may i present u,,*drum roll*

da bday girllllll!!

the princess i am when it is august 14.

thx 2 all my frens who wished n 4 my sweethearts 4 celebrating my 19th year of living.

last nite was awesome guys..

sheesha-ing *roof cafe bb*

laughing our ass off *all da time*

walking 2 bb *it was awesome kn??*

watching movie *the descent 2. da movie was heavyyyy!!*

studying?? *while waiting 4 da movie*

i love u guys to pieces!!

roof cafe shishaaaaaa!! owh yeah~

we love da view.. kn bbes???

da happy faces!

i edited dis pic sooo well didnt i?? god, im good! haha

seriously i miss u guys like hell!

it's been a while that we hang out 2gether aite peeps..

we shud do dis more often.

we were in kfc to have our sahur when suddenly witnessed a fight between a Malay guy *who knows how 2 swear in English perfectly* and an English man *who masters the art of spitting on people's face*. it was hell scary! but i managed to talk to the Malay guy after the English man went out of the restaurant. i'm a brave bitch, baby!! haha!

p/s (dis hs nthg to do wit dis post): i heard bout da conflict or *do correct me if im wrong* da broke up thingy between u n ur boyfie. god,, are you kidding me? u show me dat all dis time i was right!! didnt i warn u about karma?? i know him better than u do bcoz he's my best friend.may i repeat,, BEST FRIEND! n as i said,, U CANT BEAT ME,, BEYBEH! haha..

mrs s

2010-06-15T09:58:00.000-07:00

1. ur not from peninsular,, thk god coz ur attitude is *PUKE* not even like a malaysian. *goal!! 1-0

2. i'm not a big fan of ur blog, n i dont stalk. *goal!! 2-0

3. my personal life is none of ur business.. get out of my face whore

4. i might b fugly,, but at least, i'm not STUPID! my last pointer is much better than urs~ haha! *goal!! 3-0

5. if i repent,, insyaallah god will forgive me.. at least i'm just a bit lost not REALLY LOST! *goal!! 4-0

6. ur bf is my besfren. dont put him between me n u..

7. if he choose 2 hate me, i believe dat it's not bcoz of u ask him 2.

8. i dont hv 2 b a 'bunian' 2 make people like me.. i'm just me. *goal!! 5-0

9. n ouh,, i wonder if ur skin tone is just like mine,, wud u b as pretty as u r now? idts~ but still,, there r people saying i'm pretty. soo klh lgi lah kau! *goal!! 6-0

10. i dont mess wit ur life anymore. so dont mess wit mine.. u just feel INSECURE huh bcoz ur bf is my besfren. rite? *goal!! 7-0

another prove dat indicates how HOT i am.. people just love to mess wit me~ i dont judge people n i dont call people FUGLY.. congratz 2 dis bitch, im now judging u..

beauty is subjective honey,, u cn call me fugly if dat makes u feel good bout urself.. but we both noe dat ur fuglier simply bcoz of ur fugly personality.. u make me wanna puke! yuckkssss~

p/s aku itu udah nggk ada urusan sama cewek murahan gya kamu.. boleyh blah!!!! wakakakakka.. n now i'm laughing like a witch so dat u noe who's da real witch here.. u cnt beat me. bear dat in mind okayy..

berjudi itu berdosaaaaa

2010-06-12T19:23:00.000-07:00

alahaiii,, GREEN spoiled da game last nite..

human error~ bodoh2!!

neways,, thx 2 da capt, GERRARD 4 da fastest goal so far in FIFA 2010..

but da poorest thng dat happened 2 me last nite was,,,,

i lost da bet!

BHABIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!

ble da klh br sedar berjudi itu berdosa~

mood : bodoh,, berdosa,, miskin!

rm200 hilang sme sbb GREEN!!!

seb baek ko comeyyy,, kalo x aku da maki cow2!

shit ahhh,, kmbaliin wang gwe!!

huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu :(

aku tdo pkol 4 smate2 nk tgk england maen cm puki lmbap babi!!

kembaliin mse tdo gwe!!

ROONEY,, sila korek lubang kubor anda krana anda tidak beraksi dgn bgs mlm smlam.

hang mabok ka abe??? mnm byk??

COLE,, hang okay kot.. tp de la sket lobang2 yg hang bwt..

tensy pk cerai ngn bini hang kahh??

HESKEY,, mse nk tndok bola sila control riak wajah anda.. sgt burok yerr..

terkencing2 aku tgk! kakakakakaka

LENNON hang maen leyhh r...

LAMPARD,, anda n GERRARD sme2 pnt.. ye sye tahuuu..

kakakakakakaka..

da best part,, goalie USA,, HOWARD kne rembat ats dada!

job well done HESKEY! kah3!!

da la mls nk tulis da...

conclusion nye aku xpuas hti ngn game smlm!!

aku da klh bet!!!

bhabiiiii..

berjudi itu berdosaaaaaaaaaa...

nk smbg tdooo... xleyh tdo since smlm lpas klh bet..

huhuhuhuhuhuhu..

de spe2 nk blnje aku tgk wyg??

*tbe2. bodoh*

jgn tdo siang plssss

2010-06-11T12:03:00.000-07:00

it's 2.30 pm n i dont noe wut to do..

bsoh pggn?? xmau!!

bttr hv a nap lahh.

hoping dat i'm not gonna da indonesian sinetron cinta dan anugerah.

bkk air cond,, okayy, amek bntl busuk,, okayy..

urghhh,, bring ats ktl ibu ayh *tdo lm blik ibu jup ah.. haha!*

not long after dat,, i see a glimpse of some1 dat i really know!

i recognise da face but i cnt rmmbr who he is..

spe ehh??

then,,

i catch a glimpse of big ocean at my right side!

i turned 2 my right n ouh! a breath taking scenery of an extremely beautiful beach!

where am i?

suddenly some1 grab my waist from back.

who da hell is dis????!!!!!

wut a strong arm he has!!! omg!!!

could he b my bf??

wait. i'm currently single..

ex bf???

god!!! i swore i wont let him touched me again!

then who is dis guy??

"soo,, how's goa?"

wut??!! goa?

whoa3!!! dis is not happening~

i look back!

gosh! i almost fainted!

he's da man of my dream...

"i love it honey!"

wutta hell did i just said??

hahahahaha... it's awkward..

like friggin awkward! but it's fun!!!

"honey,, i've somethng 2 gv 2 u,, i thnk dis is da rite time n da rite place"

"ahh,, wut is it?"

he kneel down..

is he trying 2 propose??

"will u marry me?"

i was about 2 say yes! when suddenly "along!!!!!!!!!!!"

u noe wut dat means rite..

i hate sweet dreams!!!!

hate it hate it!!!!

hey handsome!! dnt u ever come in my dream again!!

u make it too ugly 2 wake up..

p/s dis is da 2nd time i dreamed of him! urgghhhh!

guy without a cock~ ahhhh

2010-06-10T08:57:00.000-07:00

msg received - kaklong k

*weh, tdy kn npk helmy ngan bela naik krete sme2.. Huhu.. Dowang ada paper kew?* _bell, ni ada org hnta msg kat k.long, huhu_

30mins later

msg received - kaklong k

nbila, org 2 bsmph dia nampk bel, dia dtg umh td. Aduh!

dis msg was sent by a good fren of mine kaklong..

oopsss,, correction,, more 2 be called sister,, not fren.

okay, 2 make a long story short,,,

someone 1 has libelled me!!!

libel?? is dat a correct word??

umphhh.. wutever it is,, i am soo mad!

in fact i cn b extremely dangerous rite now!!!

fuck dat person!

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck..

grrrrrrrrrr~~~

i called my dearest counselor,,, mr ray jr..

few mins after dat,,

yeah as usual,, i found my self laughing my ass off!

urmm.. he's some kind of a cure 4 every problem dat i hv..

uhhh,,,,,,

"inchik ray,, tlg jgn prasan sgt okayy.. i'm trying 2 pic u as a good person here. wakakakkakaka"

n 2 u mr xtau nme...

tlg jgn busuk kn nme aku ehhh...

kau yg tergile2 nk kt aku,, ble da xdpt ko bwt cte plak psl aku kn?

umphhh... pity u~

kalo xpuas hti ckp jeeee

i'm not afraid of you son of a bitch~

wut a chicken..

u only dare 2 say bad thngs about me behind my back!

u dont even hv a cock!!! ouch~ haha

i dare u 2 come out n face me b4 i got u, COCKLESS CREATURE

killers terbaek!!

2010-06-08T21:36:00.000-07:00

da bestbuddy!!!!!

went watching KILLERS wit aliff n syaz 2 days ago!

dat movies was.......................HOT!

i mean,, ashton kutcher was HOT HOT HOT!!! auwwww..

then yesterday,,

BOWLING DAY~~~~

mng besar bhaii,,,

thx 2 syaz n aliff 4 giving me da chance 2 win~ wakakakakakaka

syaz lost his bet on me...

last time he betted on me,,,

he had 2 treat me starbucksssssss,,

yesterday,, da same thng happened!

thx guys for an awesome monday n tuesday~~

mucho love~ xoxoxoxoxo

shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

2010-06-06T11:12:00.000-07:00

eyy.. u just cnt stop making up stories bout me rite..??

my life is just a drama 2 u huh~

u cn simply just put me as da main character n poof! new episode has been made..

fuck u!

i told u he was my good fren when we were in primary school

n now u named ur 3 weeks relationship wit him as forever n our friendship is never~

if he says he likes me dat doesnt mean dat i like him 2!

yg smpi ko xley pk 2 mnatang mnde weyh??

he's da 1 who came chasing after me.. n he admitted it!

n ouh u hv 2 except da fact dat i'm hot altho u cnt c it but yes,, dats a fact~

u said i'm a slut?

hmm,, yes i am? soo?? mati ke kau?? xkn?

thx soo much besfren

thx 4 making my life miserable altho da truth is urs is worse than mine

thx 4 making me lose my besfren altho u've lost a besfren n a bf.. *ouch! dat hurts~*

i dont need a fren like u..

get out of my face u loser!!!

degil nye!!

2010-06-03T05:46:00.000-07:00

bell : ibu... i'm going out wit a fren. u want anythng?

ibu : nope.. just b back b4 11.

bell : okay~

i went i out wit izzat,, fought with him,,

met jatt n frens at megamall,, watched prince of persia,,

went back home wit epul,,

n guess wut?

ayh called n told me dat ibu ws hospitalized!!!!

JENG JENG JENG JENG!!!!

apekah?? she's okay when i left home..

n now she's hospitalized!!

sba je la...

ahh,, ini la die pesakit yg xske pi hospital ituuuu...

bley smpt lgi ckp

"sbenanye ibu xnk pown msok hspital tp ayh da pkse~"

from da left :- paan tggi whoa!, jatt jmbu aww, me, haikal cute!!, khai sombong?

n ouh,, not 2 forget i wud like 2 welcome our new family mmbrs..

RAB (white) n BIT (grey)!!

RABBIT!!

love u guys muchooooo

guys??

stop lahh weyhhh... u might hv read my blog..

hv u?

if u did,, i want u 2 noe somethng dude..

u cn thnk of me as anythng.

a bitch, whore, slut, wutever u wanna call me.

but when ur in my place,,

u'll surely noe how i feel being da poorest prey in ur bestest predator's game!

who's da predator??

da dinasour!!! u noe who dat is..

some1 dat u trust da most but he's act a back stabber!

yes,, a back stabber tq~

n ouh,, keep on talking bad thngs about me coz a bitch dont gv a shit! n i enjoy picking up da rewards god gvs me..

n i wont change my story coz a bitch shud stick 2 da thngs dat she knows..

i dont noe how 2 make up stories as good as ur fren did, honey..

may god open up ur eyes regarding dis matter..

cant a person gets a 2nd chance???

2010-05-28T21:12:00.000-07:00

i've apologized like soo many times.

still u cnt c how sincere i am.

i've admitted my mistakes soo many times.

still u cnt c how i've regretted my mistakes.

wut more do u want from me?

it's not fair dat i'm d only 1 to b blamed.

i dont wanna thnk about dis stupid thng anymore..

*LNX KAU AHH!!*

cnt a person gets a 2nd chance???

urghhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

i wont apologize anymore~

i wont!!!!

dear u.

2010-05-26T04:18:00.000-07:00

dear u,,

i'm sorry bout wut had happened.

i tot by getting close 2 ur frens will tighten our relationship dat i cn get along wit u more easily.

i admit dat i was da 1 whose at fault 4 hanging out wit ur frens.

but da thng dat happened between me n ur fren inside my car was definitely not my fault n i dare 2 swear 2 god dat i nvr gv him a single chance 2 touch me.

i even warned him not to touch me.

it's up 2 u who u wanna believe in as i'm just a complete stranger 2 u.

1 thng 4 sure is dat i like u soo much dat i let u kissed me inside ur car da day we went out few days ago.

i'm sorry.

i arrived home today,, still feeling guilty 4 all my wrong doings toward u.

i'm sorry dear.....

memories

2010-05-23T05:08:00.000-07:00

i miss my old frens back in campus..

final sem was beyond crazy

drink drunk drive. haha!

life full of sins. yes. but i cnt seem to bring myself into hating dat kind of life of mine~

boyfie?

hell nooooooooooooooo.. got no time 4 dat.

scndal?

tini always says "hmm,, da same old scndalous bell" am i dat flirty? idk~

studies?

hahahahahhaha... there's a little story bout this tiny thng,

a : bell, mlm nie jd x?

b : ahh.. jd! msti jd pnye ladies nite kn!

a : haha.. ko nie mmg ahh.. okay mlm nie k. tp besok ko de paper. xpe ke?

b : paper sng lahh besok xpe

*paper final exam listening n speaking*

[soo,, party lah smpi xigt besok exam phonetic symbol]

ble result kuar,,

*listening n speaking ll ----- A+*

wahhh!! moral of da story,, kalo besok exam sila lah pg clubbing ye~

haha!

hmm,, dis pic was snapped by ibu when i ws sleeping at the back seat of the car after we went shopping for ikan segar! at da market.

y da hell did i wore dat jacket anyways..

it was freezing cold,, yes bcoz it was raining.

i've gotten rid of it from my wardrobe n put it in a box..

unfortunately,, ibu took it n placed it in HER WARDROBE!

she said it wud b useful 1 day.

ahh ye la kot~

who is dis guy?

mohd amar arsyad b wazira

he's a brother of mine.

JUST A BROTHER OF MINE.

x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0

da new me,,

well,, there's a group of people who just simply called me "perampas bf org"

wah!! am i dat HOT??

hmm.. it's not me who approached him at da 1st place. he did.

hilmi ke, daus ke, lan ke, aizat ke,, we're just frens.

nthg more than dat,

cnt u see da diff between frens n bf?

stupid biatch~

p/s single is beautiful~~~

sorry

2010-05-03T03:09:00.001-07:00

izzat amsyar~

sorry i'm not ready 4 commitment..

thank you

2010-04-10T22:54:00.000-07:00

DIDO FLORIAN CLOUD DE BOUNEVIALLE O'MALLEY ARMSTRONG
i love ur song, thank u..
u remind me of someone i used 2 love~

My tea's gone cold, I'm wondering why
I got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window
and I can't see at all
And even if I could it'd all be grey,
but your picture on my wall
It reminds me that it's not so bad,
it's not so bad

I drank too much last night, got bills to pay,
my head just feels in pain
I missed the bus and there'll be hell today,
I'm late for work again
And even if I'm there, they'll all imply
that I might not last the day
And then you call me and it's not so bad,
it's not so bad and

I want to thank you
for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you
is having the best day of my life

Push the door, I'm home at last
and I'm soaking through and through
Then you hand me a towel
and all I see is you
And even if my house falls down,
I wouldn't have a clue
Because you're near me and

I want to thank you
for giving me the best day of my life
Oh just to be with you
is having the best day of my life

n now i thnk i hv 2 move on..
like 100%-ly move on..
it has been a year since we broke up..
today was da day i told u i wanna live my life alone
i thnk i dont need u anymore~
i'll turn over a new leaf.
new life 4 sure..
without ur memories.. coz it's 2 painful.
thnk u 4 everythng~
mr BIG,, i like u 2..
but she needs u more than i do. okay?

maaf~

2010-04-07T05:26:00.000-07:00

i dont rmmbr knowing u

i dont rmmbr hearing u saying dat u like me

i dont rmmbr saving ur phone num

i dont rmmbr going out with u

so mr.lan,, u dont hv any rite 2 shout at me just bcoz i danced wit my fren at da club where u work~

my feeling is neutral~

soo stop bugging me b4 i start hating u.

syoooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

wutever happened in da past, remain there.

i dont noe u. okay??

yes i danced wit him,, bcoz i like him.

no i didnt dance wit u,, bcoz i dont like u.

get it?

platinum is not ur place.. it's public.

if it's ur place,, i dont even bother to step into it.

geli! okay???

soo as long as it's not ur place,

i'm going 2 continue shaking my ass off at da dance floor~

so it's ur problem if u c me dancing wit another guy.

coz u r nthg 2 me.. got it?

p/s : da waiter 2 bwt r cre waiter, nie lbey2 plak!! duet pown xde nk kt aku.. sorie ahhh~

pesanan penaja~

2010-04-06T03:58:00.000-07:00

ibu pesan "along, ddk 2 elok2 sket.. ko 2 still ank dre"

dlm hti,, ibu, jgn ckp cm2.. rse dose sgt2.

ayh ckp "spe ajr ko jd krg ajr cnie?!! dr kecik aku jge ko, aku syg ko, cnie ke cre ko ckp ngn aku?"

dlm hti,, ayh, mnx maaf along bwt cnie untok family kte.

pkck ustaz ckp "hdp nie menumpang d bumi Allah"

dlm hti,, ble mse aku ckp bumi nie aku pnye? sepak kang

pmpn sial ckp "pki tdg bwt dose,, bttr xpyh pki. buang mse je"

dlm hti,, amek kau aku da bkk tdg blek,, ko nk ckp pe skang ha sundal??

c busy body ckp "xpe ke kaco tunang org? pki duet die sume?"

dlm hti,, weyh die yg kaco aku. aku pown sapu ahh duet die? ko jls pe?

jiran sbelah ckp "org umah sbelah nie bsg btol la! xbley shari 2 syp ekk"

dlm hti.. makcik nie,, at least family aku communicate bkn cm family ko.. cm batu je sume"

adek ckp "along nie dgr music kuat2 xpekak ke?"

dlm hti,, pe ko ckp sorg2 neh adek? gle ke?

org 2 ckp "stop smoke pls. aku syg ko"

dlm hti,, syg pebende? kalo syg ko bg aku smoke.. jgn hlg2"

kwn kerja ckp "clubbing 2 best sgt ke smpi ko ske sgt pg?"

dlm hti,, try g skali msti nk lagiiiiiii

pemain futsal ckp "pmpn xpyh r maen bnde2 gnie. aku pown xmaen"

dlm hti,, ko nk maen cne? berat batu!

moral of da story,, xpyh la buih2 nsht bagai kt aku,, xmsok pownn.. bwt penat korg je~

tag mengetag~

2010-03-28T05:13:00.000-07:00

ann,, apekah kau nie mengetag aku yg tidak bersalah~ huhuhuhu.. terpakse lahh jwb yerr~

1) Siapakah diri anda di rumah?

kak long, driver bergaji tggi, seorg ank yg solehah! cheers!!

2) Siapakah diri anda di samping rakan?

bak kte syazry,, plg aggressive

3) 5 benda yang anda idamkan tetapi belum tercapai.

Benda? Bukan perkara?

-hyundai sonata satuuuuuu

-iphone apple *huhu,, sye miskin*

-bungalow 4 my dearest mom

-duet yg melambak lambak lambak lambak lambak lm bank account

-i need a private jet!

4) Siapakah nama pasangan anda?

-shahrehan shahrir~ hahahhaha

5) Ceritakan 5 perkara yang paling anda suka tentang pasangan anda.

-she's crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy n crazy *yes!! ske dpt knekn org*

6) Bila tarikh anda couple?

-bley eh yang?? hahahahahhaahhaha

7) Apakah kenangan pahit anda bersama pasangan anda?

-naah.. mne de~ kitorg bhagie je.. kn2?

8) Lagu tema cinta anda.

-perlu ke?

9) Apa perubahan yang anda ingin lihat dari pasangan anda?

-dah2 la soalan2 cnie...

10) Tag 10 rakan anda yang lain.

tag? perlu ke?

-Abg Zoul haha

-Razwa Rossa

-Cik Tina

-Mira Jarom

-Wanie Parachute

-Nadia Swift

-igtkn nk tag Ray tp rse2 cm die x bwt je bnde2 cnie~

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

8 thngs about BELL..

Pertama : saye comel - it's a fact okayy

Kedua : i'm loud

Ketiga : i'm a bully

Keempat : i'm a clubber~~ dance dance dance!

Kelima : i'm a smoker. menthol loverrrr!

Keenam : i love cats - cute ones only hahahaha

Ketujuh : i cnt live a day without mr smelly n menthol.. muah2!

Kelapan : i always stick up 4 my frens,, xcye tnye ahh diorg!

special thx 2 cean ehh,, ske ssakn aku ngn bnde tag mengetag nieeee..

Sekian,terima kasih

dunhill menthol satuuuuu.....

2010-03-27T06:11:00.000-07:00

ketagih ketagih ketagih!!!!!!

haiyyaaa...

i cnt live a day without menthol..

addiction towards menthol has begun.

ayh > jgn la mrh,, kte kn geng skang.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

maiza > ko nk aku happy kn?? yes,, aku sgt happy skang.

thk god ko brambos dr hdp aku.

hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha!

ps ; yes aku da bkk tdg n start smoking blek. so?? aku ssakn ko ke minah?

manusia skang nie mkin ske jge tpi mini skirt org.

n ouhh,, conflict between my besfren n my other besfren's gf is near to an end.

*i guess. hahahahaha*

thx 2 me okayy ann.. hahahahahaha!

*npe aku ske sgt glak nie?*

grow up plsssss

2010-03-26T05:32:00.000-07:00

dis is shahrehan shahrir

n she's my besfren dear,, mess wit her,, u mess wit me.

dis post is special 4 my dearest besfren's gf, deborah ngerong of sabah..

act i've already posted dis 2 ur blog,,

but in case u hv problem to approve it, i decided 2 post it on my fucking blog.

debby wutever thing u've done to ann is wrong n u noe dat rite?

moving on is not easy for a person who had been DUMPED.

4 a person who do da dumping job,, ouh hell yes he cn move on.

esp when he gets a substitute like u.

plus,, if she hasnt move on,, dats her problem NOT YOURS.

y dont u solve dis problem professionally.

i mean cmon.. pe yg u nk sket hti sgt ngn ann nieeee????

she did nthg wrong.

i hope we cn overcome dis problem like adults.

u cr gado ngn ann pown u bkn dpt pape.

sabah's my bestfren.

i tot i noe him V well.

maybe im wrong. he cnt even handle a chick.

pity him.

chill bbe,, sabah's will always b by ur side till he finds a substitute 4 u.

dont blame ann for dis cmmnt.

i always stick up 4 my frens.

cheers~

a msg 4 u,, pls grow up.. plssssssssssssssss

si jalang

2010-03-24T00:06:00.000-07:00

maslina ainaaaaaaaaaaaa~~~~~~~~

is it a sin if a girl doesnt hs a dad anymore?

i dont thnk it is..

is it a burden 2 u seeing dat girl is leading a gud life?

i cn c it is~

bitch,, told u soo many times. in dis war ur not gonna win.

big army with big heart will hunt u down.

before anything bad happens,, i thnk maybe u shud pissed off.

be mature, be nice n we'll do da same 2 u.

da words u've been using indicates ur 'kampungness'

dont ever thnk dat ur on da rite side

dont act like u dont noe wut we cn do

do care bout other's feeling...

dont thnk dat if u dont care,, others wont to.

ur wrong~

u hurt my fren,,

i'll hurt u!

it's a warning, bitch.

be alert!

u!

2010-03-13T08:29:00.000-08:00

i finally i got 2 meet him!

we danced on da dance floor like hell.

man, dat was da best nite ever~

thx 2 u.. yes u!!

u noe who u r~

PLATINUM FOREVER!!

*putyourfuckinghandsup*

say hello 2 soulmates

2010-03-06T07:33:00.000-08:00

SEVEN??

AHAA,, YES2 SEVEN.

TELL ME IF U NOE WUT DIS NUM MEANS,

tim, lil, sya

short form as the chicks aka soulmatesss

thursday n friday nites were heaven!!!!!!!

thx 2 u guys~

muah!

take us 2 da dance floor people!

hepi bday

2010-03-03T07:49:00.000-08:00

hmm.. i dont hv da time to update my precious blog ayyy..

too bz with asses [assignments] n endless testssssssss~

1st thing 1st.

noor akmar md noor aka ibu

hepi belated 40th bday,,

along syg ibu sgt2~ muah2!!!!!!!

dis happen to be my post on 26th feb.. :P

2ndly,,

hartini hassan aka my sister 4eva,,

hepi belated bday alsoo,,

i love u!

dis happen to be my post on 28thfeb.. :P

3rdly,,

en adam ali aka aliff burhanuddin aka precious fren,,

hepi belated bday 2 u 2,

j'taime!

may our frenship will nvr find the end~

hmmmm.. there's soo much thngs dat had happened last month..

but i've succeeded in going tru all da circumstances,,

hmm.. it's okay bell.. there were all just tiny thngs..

wut i'm going 2 do now is 2 be wit my fellow bbes dat i love wit all my heart n soul..

tina, ann..

be strong

i will always got ur back sygss~~

biatches,, stop messing up wit my bbes,

miss A n miss D,,

get a grip.. u nvr noe how world cn turn out 2 b hell.

move aside will u??

hmm.. in da mood of going somewhere where i cn dance~

cnt wait 4 tomorrow nite people!

yeeehaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!

single is perfect

2010-02-21T16:45:00.000-08:00

single suits me well

i dont need a man 2 complete my life 4 da time being..

i just wanna concentrate on myself n my studies 1st.

people, if ur planning 2 flirt with me, bttr dont.

i just hate d idea of having any relationships rite now..

okay gentleman?

i'm a tough woman.. hell yeah! i'm a good fren n counsellor.. hell yeah! i'm enjoying life now.. hell yeah!!! so say yes 2 life! yes!

i dont care

2010-02-12T03:24:00.000-08:00

i dont care! bout who? 2 people.. 1 kau dan 1 lg kau. y shud i care anyways,, u nvr seemed 2 care bout me! soo,, from now on, i'll turn myself into a hideous, feelingless creature dat nobody wants to be friends wit. phm?

it was da day dat i suddenly became insanely, mad about somethng.. feeling soo stressed up dat i cnt seem to control myself. y?

first story : a fren. chat, get some unknown boys n went dating.. i can say dat it's her hobby. she just loves being da centre of attraction. 1 word term, desperate! i dont noe wut happen till she became a beast instead of a belle. cnt blame her ex bf 4 her desperateness coz,, they broke off bcoz they hv a lot of affairs behind each others back. soo yeahh.. da story begins here, she nvr heard any of her frens word [dat includes me!!] she's da 1 who's always rite about everythng. seeing a lot of guys in a day is not a sin. but girl,, going out wit a guy who u noe only 3 days ago witout asking ur fren 2 accompany u,, shows ur complete stupidity, fucking wrong decision! u noe y? bcoz it leads u to a midnite movie,, dat u cnt go back 2 hostel at dat time or u'll be fined, turning of ur fucking cellphone so dat no1 cn call u [nk privacy la ktekn] n he brought u 2 a place where he ws planning 2 rape u n da most important thng came 2 my house at 3 am bcoz ur soo fucking afraid at time! thk god i love u soo much at dat time. or else,, i just let u be wit dat guy. i told u dont messed up wit guys, u nvr listen. now,, u hv problems wit ur course mate, I DONT CARE! n pls,, stop ur fucking sympathy status at facebook or ym. i dont like it,, coz yeah,, they make me look like i'm a gay which i am not. JUST STOP BEGGING!!

second story : a boy. more likely 2 be called bf. he said he doesnt love me twice already so wuts da use of keeping me in dis love game? i'm not ur bitch nor [in a nicer word] girl. if u wanna take revenge on wut my besfren had done 2 u. u already had it. no more words of 143 or imy or anthng dat u jerk used 2 say. it sounds like a scratch on the blackboard now. get it? i always want u 2 come clean 2 me. u hv a girl behind my back, ur seeing somebody else on valentines, just tell me! wut is wrong wit u.. nvr tell lies 2 ur gf.. u've promised! i've stopped smoking bcoz of u. i've stopped going 2 clubs bcoz u told me 2. cnt u at least appreciate dat? i love u soo much. i nvr say dat i dont love u. but u, u cn just simply say dat u dont love me anymore n not 2 call u? WTF? fine.. dont beg me n i wont beg u. I WONT! is it wrong 4 me 2 suspect somethng when u didnt put a call on hold just 2 say dat ur talking 2 ur fren? who is she compared 2 me? who???

GET OUT OF MY FACE!!

fucking pissed!

tesl C aka company C

2010-02-08T04:58:00.000-08:00

an experience dat cant be spoken by wordsssss..

i love u guys ketat2! muah2!!!

YOU! YES, YOU!

2010-02-02T22:22:00.000-08:00

hey you!
gv my faeez maiza back 2 me u BLOODY PLKN!

i miss my faeez maiza...

SOOO DAMN FUCKING MUCHO..

n heppy monthsarry syg..

i love u! muahh~

ps : last nite my neighbourhood went black out! nk lepas boring, me, angah, kibah, ibu and ayh played...... SPELLING BEE.

haha my frens called my family weird. it's an honour. seriously! *bkn sme family weird. haha!

incomplete

2010-02-01T23:26:00.000-08:00

sem 1 sem 2..

spot any diff??

hmm,, obviously da num..

yes dats 1.

any implicit facts?

hmm,, guess no 1 knows.

bcoz it's my life, uhuh...

sem 1 and sem 2 brought a huge diff in my life.

sem 1 ws all about having fun and getting high marks 4 test and stuffs like dat.

but sem 2, it suddenly became superbly, extremely, extraordinarily challenging bebeh!

frankly, it's V hard..

but dis is d only time 4 me 2 grow up kn?

n i thnk i did.

tensy x psl n i went back 2 my old habit.

SMOKING.

okay2, xbgge lgsg.

but dats wut happens..

pow jihan skotak, nvr did it b4 but i did it dis 2nd sem.

man,,

ws called a prostitute by my mentally ill ex-bf.

hmm,, wutever,, he's got issue wit his life.

my new bf on d other hand is V supportive.

i love u so much syg.

frens,

still in tesl C

same old class

still hv them around.

same old frens.

still hv their love

same old love

still hv their attention

same old attention.

besfrens?

da title somehow belongs 2 no body.

no body in UiTM.

so wut is incomplete?

still didnt noe dat.

i cnt seem 2 understnd myself.

not now, not ever.

cn somebody tell me wut did i missed out of my life?

hmmmmmmmm.....

*wonder wonder wonder

*think think think

tesl terbaekkkkkkkkkkkkk

2010-01-30T10:48:00.000-08:00

1 day trip to kl was sooooooo damn tiring..

but,,

it's fun..

i mean,, hell fun okayyyyy

ipba,, hmm nthg much 2 tell..
intec,, we [kuantan teslian] were extremely excited when we manage 2 meet our teslian family in intec, shah alam... thx u guys 4 welcoming us there... ehem,, n looks like kuantan girls teslian hv a new obsession,, ehem2.. [mr beatbox] i dont love u but my frens areeeeeee
sunway,, i love sunway!!!!!!!!!! n ouh,, surprise2, i bump into AIDA there.. aha,, wut a small world kn bbe??
genting sempah,, serious best gle kt c2. ngaha!!
da restttttt,, let da pic do da talkingggggg....

back in action! wacha!

2010-01-26T07:39:00.000-08:00

nurfarahi nabilah mohd azmi

is back in action!!!!!!!!!

post yg tbe2..

mnyengal xtntu psl lah hr nie..

bodoh2.

i gv up

2010-01-23T21:43:00.000-08:00

mohamad faeez maiza mohd tarmizi,

just so u noe, i nvr hated u.

just so u noe, i will always love u.

just so u noe, i cnt leave u.

but just so u noe, i already gv up on u.

wut kind of revenge is dis?

n y me?

i dont undrstnd u anymore.

i'm sorry.

miracle!!!!

2010-01-21T20:41:00.000-08:00

last nite he called me!!!!!!

it seems like he knows wut's inside my heart..

smlm br tls post psl die kottttt...

gle babi miracle kn???

hahaha

4am

haih.. asl tbe2 tjge nie? pe bnde vibrate bwh bdn aku nie? jup2, asl lgu michelle branch plak nie? eh,, MAIZA!

i miss you soo much syg.. it's good 2 hear ur voice. hlg risau i.

muah muah muah muah.

da minute u say i miss u,, my heart bounces wit joy.

da minute u say i love u,, my hands shiver *:)*

i miss u 2 syg.. n i love u!

bell is now listening 2 sleeQ cun saja..

crdt 2 meera coz bg lgu nieeee..

i thnk i shud drowned myself coz dis song is act da lme but i tot it's a new song... *bodoh kn??*

wut 2 do,, i'm 2 bz 2 update myself wit all da good new songssss smpi lgu lme pown igtkn br lg.

syg,, i igt u xtau lgu nie rpenye u tau

MALU okayyyyyy....

btw, dis song is not suitable 4 usss,,

pick another song okayy sygggg...

makan sajaaaaa....

2010-01-21T05:39:00.000-08:00

ibu asked me y da title is "makan sajaaaa"

she nvr see me eating late at nite after i went into UiTM

but da truth issssssssss

8pm

bell : ibu,, lapa....

ibu : g la mkn 2.. haihh ko nieee

10pm

bell : angah, ko xlpa ke??

angah : msk maggi jom!

12pm

bell : lpanyeeee.. *korek2 beg cr cadbury

npe mkn je nie???

hmmm...

tension kahh??

mgkn tension thn rinduuu kotttt...

atau tension da nk hbs foundation??

urgghh,,, how cn i describe life l8ly..

i dont really enjoy it.

reason?

bcoz it SUCKS

can u imagine a day without even a msg from ur bf?

nk mti ouhhhhhh..

so i HV to keep my self bz to avoid myself from CRYINGGG..

gle la kau nyahhhh

maryam said "only now i cn see ur weakness, bell"

faeez cnt call me 4 a week. y?

1. he's running out of cdt, soo,, he gv his phone 2 da teacher in PLKN

2. we fought last week sooo yeahh..phm2 je lahhh.

p.s sygggggg.. rindu lahhhh

campus gv me a headache l8ly..

with all da assignments, drama, story telling, demo speech thgy.

i cnt wait 2 finish foundation..

but da question is,,

am i ready for degree?

surpisingly, d answer is I DONT NOE.

cn i suicide now???

if i do it,, cn anyone pls take good care of my faeez maiza?

plsssssss????

i love u. fullstop!

2010-01-12T19:41:00.000-08:00

mohamad faeez maiza mohd tarmizi

i love u.

between 2 BFs

2010-01-06T09:14:00.000-08:00

hmmm...

besfren or boyfren??

i dont noe..

i prefer not to choose.

there's a BUT.

they hate each other.

y??

i noe da reason.

i prefer not to tell.

i wanna b greedy.

i dont care.

i dont wanna choose.

between love n frenship,

both r important 2 me rite now.

i need both.

she said "cant u thnk?? i dont want u to make my mistake again n again!!"

he said "it's ur decision bby. dont let me go. i need u"

i'm trapped.

cn anybody help me now???

bengang siot!!

2009-12-28T20:54:00.000-08:00

i'm supposed to be driving 2 mega today,,

duh.. i already got my license 4 god sake!!

asl xbg bwk kte plak nie????

mrhnye!!!!!!!!

ps : angah said she freak out after i said "xnk bwk rmi2..kalo mati kak long sorg jer" duhh.. does dat make any sense??

*i love jelly beans*

he had such quiet eyes

supposedly

letting go

heart

promise

2012

a thousand years

MAMN....

this hurts

broken

i turn to you

through

hope.

a proud sister.

dream

when the time comes.

IF ONLY

insidious

black

i love you, i did

MAMN

bryan adams - everything i do, i do it for you

hero

zoul.

stay silent or speak ur mind. you choose.

if you have valid proves, then talk.

ayah

this is bell.

back to normal

again

growing up

backing off

thx

akeelah and the bee

precious possessions

study week

empty

a crush

hellooooooooo oct~

duhhhh

not now,, nor ever..

my 2 fav people!

my fav guy..

a month in UiTM SHAH ALAM!

blessed

mrs s

beauty is subjective honey,, u cn call me fugly if dat makes u feel good bout urself.. but we both noe dat ur fuglier simply bcoz of ur fugly personality.. u make me wanna puke! yuckkssss~

berjudi itu berdosaaaaa

jgn tdo siang plssss

guy without a cock~ ahhhh

killers terbaek!!

shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

degil nye!!

cant a person gets a 2nd chance???

dear u.

memories

sorry

thank you

DIDO FLORIAN CLOUD DE BOUNEVIALLE O'MALLEY ARMSTRONG

maaf~

pesanan penaja~

tag mengetag~

dunhill menthol satuuuuu.....

grow up plsssss

si jalang

u!

say hello 2 soulmates

hepi bday

single is perfect

i dont care

tesl C aka company C

YOU! YES, YOU!

incomplete

tesl terbaekkkkkkkkkkkkk

back in action! wacha!

i gv up

miracle!!!!

makan sajaaaaa....

i love u. fullstop!

i love jelly beans